Thursday, March 15, 2012

Top 10 Things NOT to Say to Woo a Wine Lover…



1. So, what do you think the best name would be for a Walmart wine?

2. I got this wine from Trader Joes, it was a steal! How about we go back to your place, unscrew the cap and taste it together?

3. I just love this Pinot Noir from Ohio, what do you think?

4. Well Robert Parker likes it. He gave it a 94, we don't even have to taste it!

5. How Merlot can you go?

6. Hey baby, wanna corkscrew?

7. I bet you've never seen a bung hole like mine!

8. Really, I only drink white wine, can we order a buttery California Chardonnay instead of that Syrah you find so interesting?

9. Nice rack!

10. This wine smells of pretentious cow poo, bacon, barnyard, rotten eggs, green olives, asparagus, green pepper, the zoo, forest floor, mushrooms and cat pee. Want some?

For a few ideas that might help you go the distance with your favorite wineaux, read here.

5 comments:

  1. This is HILARIOUS!! They are all so funny!
    Thanks for the morning laugh.
    =)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Dean, I hear morning laughs pair great with Spanish coffee!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh, how bout this one?

    "I'm bigger than your biggest Cab, care to find out?"

    Let's have fun with this, add your favorite Non-pickup line below.

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  4. Here's another, cause I'm on a roll…

    "Oh baby, you’re gonna make me pop this cork."

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  5. I'm wondering… have you ever fingered a bung hole?

    ReplyDelete