Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Men are Red Wine… Women are White

Like hailing from two completely different planets, wine (and genders) can often be something of polar opposites. While this might be a bit of an overgeneralization, there is still an undeniable element of truth running through. So, let’s use our creative palates and take it one step further and say Men are Red Wine and Women are White Wine; substitute the wine for the gender and see what I mean:

Men are always running at least 10 degrees warmer.
Women feel like they’re living in a refrigerator.

Men are smooth, forward, bold, dark, brooding, spicy, intriguing and, well… just a little bit dirty.
Women are the life of the party—bright, zesty, flirty and sometimes giggly or even bubbly.

Men are happiest to sit down with a big, juicy steak.
Women love finger food.

Men proudly display their bigger package.
Women’s shapes are dainty and slender.

Men think they get better with age.
Some women get old and flat, but there are a few who know the secret.

Men think they’re the best.
Women know better – the most expensive drinkable bottle of wine in the United States (according to Forbes.com) is a 1978 Montrachet from Domaine de la Romanee-Conti… um, that would be a white wine.

In all seriousness, white and red wines can be as different as night and day—just like the people who drink them. But, if I were to try and turn a white wine lover onto red wine, well, that one’s easy; I would select a fucking Merlot.

While I am loyal to my luscious and most favorite Pinot noir, I wouldn’t recommend this wine for the novice. A Pinot noir is a black diamond ski run, not suitable for a beginner. A Pinot’s delicacy and intricacy would be lost on someone who’s never enjoyed red wine and the high acidity might possibly even burn their mouth. Merlot is light, approachable and easy-drinking. While some (older-vine) Merlot can be bigger, bolder and spicier, it’s generally a soft, supple, not overly tannic and very fruit-forward quaffable wine sure to lure that white lover over to the dark side.

I chose a Ravenswood Winery 2006 Merlot ($18) from Sonoma County, California, well balanced with friendly plum, cherry and vanilla flavors and an irresistible and delightful chocolate finish; who wouldn’t like that? Until we sip again…

Cheers!

This post was written in response to this month’s Wine Blog Wednesday #67, hosted by Joe Roberts at 1 Wine Dude, who challenged us to “pick a red wine you would use to introduce a white wine drinker to red wines for the first time.” This is actually my first contribution, thanks for hosting Joe!

14 comments:

  1. Your posts make me wish I knew more about wine. But I always love your writing!

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  2. Tamara - fantastic writing style. I love your descriptions. I almost went Merlot too, but with all the WAMerlot lately I didn't want people to think I was bleeding Merlot.

    P.S. Women can be a little bit dirty too.

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  3. Thanks Rachel, I hope you're learning more by reading my posts, thanks for your loyal follow!

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  4. Merlot is all I am hearing about these days....it is great to see it is coming back!! Fun blog to read, thanks!

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  5. Totally agree about the Pinot Noir! Too much for a newbie red wine drinker.

    Well I'll be drinking lots of Merlot tonight for the twitter tasting... so maybe I will find a Merlot my non-red wine drinking mother will like?! I'll keep you posted.

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  6. Oh please, this is exactly why people don't take feminism seriously. Get over yourself. Your vaginas don't make you special.

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  7. Oh please Anonymous, as if feminism could really be taken seriously. Women are superior and it's a simple truth and I'm willing to debate you on this, but even in the simplest form, women are different from men and there's really no such thing as equal. Where's your balls anyway, hiding behind your anonymous status? I can tell you for a fact vaginas make women very special and you just have vagina envy, but that's okay, you're forgiven.

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    1. No, you're fucking deluded and stupid. Your inferiority complex is showing. I'm not talking about gender, I'm talking about your intelligence.

      Seriously. Get the fuck over yourself.

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    2. you know what you're right baby how bout I take you out and treat you like a lady?

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  8. By the way, Lake Oswego is not Portland. Don't claim a city you don't live in. Poser.

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  9. Clearly, you're not a fan, and that's okay. But really, why so hostile? This blogpost was intended as a playful approach to wine. A way to turn someone on to what if often seen as an intimidating beverage. You've really taken it much too seriously and if I somehow offended you, I'm very sorry.

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  10. Kudo's to you for leaving this up instead of censoring it. There's a name for someone posting as Anonymous without the cojones to identify themselves and leaving vitriolic and misogynistic posts: TROLL. Don't apologize and don't feed him.

    While I am not a fan of using gender to define anyone in any way, I am intelligent enough to see how you were just trying to make it amusing and fun for folks.

    To answer the orignal question, I'd go for a Sangiovese or a Tempranillo. A carefully selected Syrah might do the trick too, something on the less bold/fruitier/less tannic. I think it is the tannins that are usually the most off-putting to white drinkers...

    To turn the original question around, to: "What white wine would you serve a red wine drinker to get them to love red wine?" - Well, that's easy - a blanc de noir, like Anne Amie's Prisme (for one)...if they are a red drinker who also enjoys bubbly (as I used to describe myself) it will work every time.

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  11. Thanks Jill, censoring was tempting, but his remarks, though nasty, are still quite entertaining. I don't actually get many comments these days, maybe I should be happy I don't.

    I like your suggestions of wine. Tempranillo was actually the wine that started me on my journey and thankfully led me away from beer and the dreaded wine spritzers.

    As far as the white to turn a red drinker on, the Prisme's certainly a good choice, but bubbles only appeal to a certain segment of wine drinkers. I might suggest dry Riesling like one from Brooks Winery. The depth of character and flavor, richness and mouthfeel, balanced acidity and overall complexity would turn any wine drinker on!!

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  12. ..or David Hill's delicious Riesling...so good we bought a case of it as our house white. I think we need to buy another one, come to think of it!

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